Fitting in both languages will help our child in school, but can be a juggle and will not always go smoothly. Often the balance in how you use your languages at home will change over time and need readjusting. What is important is to notice tensions and difficulties when they come up, so that you can think and talk about them and find the best way as a family!

Changes are likely to happen as children grow up. Readjustments will be needed at times, for example when children start preschool or school. This can be a challenging time. Children will now hear and use the school language for some hours every day. New language experiences can be intense, and you might find that children will not always switch back to their home language when coming home in the afternoon.

As a parent you might observe your child ‘experimenting’ with their new language skills in playful ways. For example they might build words or sentences in the new language into their role play. As children increasingly start to master the new language, it can feel easier for them to carry on using it at home. It is quite likely that they will try to use it when speaking at home to their siblings and parents. In fact, children might be quite persistent to use one language more than the other and you as a parent might find this difficult to change.

The struggle to find a balance that feels right to you and your child can bring tensions into interactions and relationships at home. Sometimes it might feel more comfortable to adapt to your child’s language choices. In addition, daily life can be demanding especially when dealing with children. For instance, think of a day that you are rushing to a school meeting or elsewhere and you need to get ready with your child as soon as possible. Your child is being playful and you have no time to deal with that…

As a parent you need to be aware that not using, or only sometimes using the heritage language at home will mean that your child will over time develop better language skills in the other language. If children do not hear and actively use their heritage language, they will start losing their skills in that language and probably become fluent only in the majority language.